Sunday, July 01, 2012
Have been off sparkpeople lately. But am tired of sabotaging myself with all the mindless eating just to keep my emotions in control, which were actually not in control and eating illogically which just made me sick. I do not even want to see a chocolate pudding, tart, pizza, doughnut, mango shakes and all those f**king awesome things I love, for now!
Have been going through a lot. It's those moments when you have faith, few happy moments in between sad ones but you still do not know what to do with life and some major decisions that need to be made. It feels as if somebody has trapped you in a jar, would open it for a few seconds and will close it again. You do not know who's more important? You or the other person? You do not know if you can totally depend on someone. You keep questioning yourself, which path should I take? And you just make yourself suffer at last and do nothing else. It's when we try to see future because we don't want to lose something in present, that makes life a pain in the ass. All in all, what I have learnt that it's all about you. Do what you want to do, take risks, whether they will pay off or not only god knows! And only time can tell. But believe!
So, I am back to spark, missed this place soooo much... back to tracking and working out from tomorrow on! Feeling so relaxed, calm and happy to be back here! yayyy!! :))